Friday, December 9, 2011

Take me for what I am

...who I was meant to be.

Being true to yourself is something that's really important to me. I believe in morals and following your heart. I believe in doing what you think is right, even if others think that you're crazy, or wasting your time. I believe in expressing your opinion, even if others don't agree,
However, I don't believe in insulting people who don't agree with you.
Hi. Yeah, I swear. Yeah, I can have my moments where I can be rude, or angry, or twitchy.
That doesn't make you better than me.
Today, someone said to me "I don't swear, because I have morals."
Yeah. Eff you too. Because that's basically what you said to me.

I will never be ashamed of who I am, and I don't need you to be ashamed for me.

Thank you very much.

Friday, November 25, 2011

A Thousand Clever Lines...

...unread on clever napkins.

As The Beatles would say "Ob-la-di, ob-la-da, life goes on" 
And it does. My life got crazy, and wild, and way, way ahead of me. And along the way, things got left behind.
I find that if I tell people I'm in the process of writing a novel, they let me off the hook.
I'm hoping you will offer me the same courtesy :)

My novel, newly dubbed "Evening, Star" stars (hee hee) Etoile Gordon.
Etoile is my baby. Never have I loved a character as much as I love her. And trust me when I say, I've had a lot of characters. There was just something about her that was stuck in my brain almost 24/7. I created her for a role playing thread on the NaNoWriMo website. When NaNo finally came around, it was like Etoile was tapping repeatedly on my brain, forcing me to abandon my previous plot (which I absolutely loved, by the way) and write a book about her instead.
I was weak and spineless, and I relented.
So far it's turned out all right. I'm super behind on my word count. I couldn't tell you how many times I just couldn't get the words to flow.
But man, do I love this story.

Friday, September 23, 2011

I am Unwritten

Can't read my mind, I'm undefined.

We are all individual. No two people are alike.
School is like a snowstorm. A big mess of a situation that, when viewed from afar, are pointless clumps of matter, or bodies as you may prefer to say.
But when you put aside the cold-front and look closer, you see that every snowflake, like every person. is beautiful.
What they do with that beauty is up to them.


Thursday, September 22, 2011

Baby seasons change but people don't

and I'll always be waiting in the backroom.

I have so many expectations for my life. It's killing me. I go into situations daydreaming about how things might turn out.
Never once has a daydream be accuate.
I was so excited for my junior prom. I thought that for once I would actually feel beautiful. I hoped my crush (I can't even remember who) or any guy would come over, tell me I look amazing, and ask me to dance.
It's laugh worthy now.
I enjoyed being with my girls. Dancing was fun. But some people got too close and others not close enough.
At one point I was terrified of a friend.
Sometimes I wish I hadn't gone. I was grounded, but my parents made an exception for prom. It's supposed to be the best night of your life.
There's always next year, I suppose.
I'm so looking forward to college. To get far away from people who've hurt me, away from feeling like a failure when I'm in the same room as my parents.
I'm trying so hard really.
Know one gets that.
I was told I look like Yale, but I feel like a community college.
It's like, why set a bar too high?
Why try so hard for something you're not going to get anyway?
Why bother living with nothing to live for.

Friday, September 16, 2011

Bad news

Blogger doesn't like my videos. They won't load and I don't know why.
I might be moving my blog. To wordpress. If I find out that it will take my videos?
And I will carry you all with me in a bucket!
I love you all.

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Something new is coming!!!!

I'm going to start posting videos!!!! One's of me and my friends just goofing off and all that jazz. I'm excited. I think you guys will like them. I have at least three ready that I will (hopefully) post later today. Otherwise they'll go up tomorrow.
Tis exciting.

Friday, August 19, 2011

Brain Blast

Got my novel idea. And (very very very) vaguely planned.

Tagline: 10 people, 10 stories, one school.
That's it. I don't even have a title yet.